I am a doer, a strategizer. When I’m presented with a problem my brain goes in to this weird computing mode. If it was a 1970s SyFy show there would be little lights blinking and beep, boop, beep sounds going off all while a motorized, monotone voice repeatedly said “computing”. Then the plan of action … Continue reading Beep Boop Beep, Just One Door = Progress

I’ve been writing this in my head for weeks. There’s actually a file called “writing” on my computer that's well over 2,000 words, were I’ve started it several times. Each time is different. Sometimes the writing is fueled by anger, sometimes despair, sometimes exhaustion. It’s taken several weeks, but this is the first time I’ve … Continue reading Our Current State, Plus A Few More Fire Engines

This weekend will mark the anniversary of our house fire, truly a life event that propelled us onto a completely different course and altered the timeline of our lives. I haven’t written in a long while. Harvey happened and my entire city felt like I had been feeling for 8 months, lost and sad and … Continue reading Dear Yoga, I’m Sorry by Chris

One thing I learned in therapy during the last 8 months is when there is tragedy, no matter the cause, the emotional response is always the same. During Harvey I knew how the victims felt, not because our house flooded, but because I know what it feels like to loose everything suddenly. I know what … Continue reading Dear California, There is Hope by Chris

Before the fire I wasn't sure I'd be continuing with photography in the same scope I had done in the past. My heart wasn't there. It had become work. I was frustrated and tired. As I dug through the rubble of my home, I entered what was left of my office and searched for my … Continue reading A Photography Project From My Heart by Chris

I thought I was done with panic attacks. It really has been months since I last had one. If I think on them hard enough I can still feel the remnants of the feelings, they linger in my mind and in my heart. After a very full day of volunteering I received the following email. … Continue reading When Panic Attacks by Chris

We spent five days sitting in our house waiting for tragedy. Honestly after you experience tragedy, there’s a part of you that’s always expecting it again. I watched people get off boats both in person and on TV and while most of them are smiling, there is an instant where there is a blank stare. It’s … Continue reading Houston Strong, Texas Proud by Chris

I have been trying to write about this for a while now. There are a lot of emotions attached to this experience, there’s a lot of pain and hurt and guilt and all the things I’ve written about thus far. They are the things that take time to work through, the things you have to … Continue reading With Glad and Sincere Hearts by Chris

Noise is hard. Drama is hard. One of my favorite TV shows is The Walking Dead. I have a slight fascination with zombie based lore. Our fire was on a Friday, the new season premiered two days later on Sunday. I haven’t been able to watch a single episode. Watching a show that places me … Continue reading Unforced Rhythms of Grace by Chris

Days after the fire a family friend messaged me and let me know friends of hers had a bed and some other furniture they would like to give me. Days after the fire I couldn’t even comprehend buying underwear, much less what furniture we would need. My brain was broken, it didn’t function. I’m not … Continue reading PTSD and Other Tales